Getting a phone call from the acquisition editor of my publishing company (!!!) telling me they were interested in buying my manuscript was one of the best mornings of my life. Finally, finally, my dream of being published was going to come true. I squeed. I bounced. I cried. I laughed. I acted like a complete, bumbling idiot on the phone.
Basically, I was smitten.
And then I waited.
In an introduction e-mail from the acquisition editor, I was told, This business is a lot of waiting followed by breathless moments of “get this done now, please!” And, well, that pretty much sums up the last eight weeks of my life (not that I’ve been counting).
Every morning, I checked my e-mail with equal parts excitement and nerves. I couldn’t wait to get started on edits, yet I was terrified to read what a professional editor thought of my
So you can imagine the butterflies floating around in my stomach–who, by the way were apparently all carrying atomic bombs–when I got the e-mail I’d be waiting for. It was time for my first round edits.
Now, let me say that my editor is not a scary person. In the few interactions I’ve had with her, she’s been very nice, informative, and friendly. That still didn’t stop the anxiety I felt over opening her notes and reading what she thought needed to be changed or worked on or even–gasp–deleted.
I’m not new to having people critique my work. I have a strong network of amazing women that help me with anything and everything that comes flying from my fingers. They make changes, offer suggestions, tell me what’s working and what’s not. Even still, the nervousness I felt when I opened my editor’s suggestions had nothing on the anxiety I’d felt sending my MS to pre-readers and betas.
I don’t know what it is, really. Maybe it’s that this is a person I’ve never had any interaction with before. Maybe it’s that she’s a professional editor. Or maybe it’s just that this means I am really on this journey. This marks the first steps toward publication.
And, I’ll be honest, as much as that excites me, it scares the shit out of me, also.
Once this sucker is all polished and pretty, once the time comes where my book is available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble, that’s it. I will always, always be a published author.
Freak out? Absolutely.
But I want this. I’ve worked hard for this.
And I’m ready.